下面是英语配音用的字幕，日和s1e4。师帮我看看里面的翻译，为什么有的地方是过去时？
（下面的英文翻译是某欧美字幕组的，中文翻译是各组和某E混合的，其中华盟的成分最多……）
日和s1e4
H: Three hours remain until a huge meteoriod hits planet Earth. 距离超巨大陨石与地球相撞还有三小时,接下来我们将变更播出计划
H:At this point we’ll be switching our program to our final live show and present to you songs and comedies with our wonderful guests. 接下来我们将变更播出计划，进行充满欢歌笑语的最后一次现场直播，并特意请来了豪华嘉宾阵容
ALL:The End
H:The world is in chaos knowing that in three hours the human race will end. 在距人类灭亡还有三小时的现在, 全世界都陷入了大骚乱中
H:Let’s stop giving a damn about anyone else until the end. 希望大家不要破罐破摔 坚持到最后
H:Let me introduce our fabulous guests. 接下来为您介绍豪华的嘉宾阵容
H:First, he’s been singing Enka ballads for the past 30 years, Obayashi Ichirou-san首先是三十年如一日钻研演歌的大林一郎先生
H:Ahhh, He’s totally naked!啊啊 全裸！
H:The big dog of the Enka world, Obayashi-san!演歌界泰斗大林先生竟然…
H:Just what you’d expect on the last day on Earth, shocking happenings right from the start!不愧是地球末日，一上来就爆猛料！
O:Naked Carnival.全裸嘉年华
H: He’s saying something!他好像说了些什么！
O: Enka irritates me for some reasons.演歌真让人不爽
H: Eh?!哎！
H: Obayashi-san, you hate Enka?!大林先生您讨厌演歌的吗！？
O: I like it about as much as a shit-covered parait.仅次于沾了便便的冷糕
H: I don’t understand your level of hate!搞不明白您讨厌的标准！
O: (唱)Suppon ponpoko ponpoko rin (意义不明)
H: What the heck are you singing?您唱什么呢？！
H: Um, Obayashi-san just got an unsuitable hustle on,but let me introdece our other wonderful guests.呃 虽然大林先生做出了十分负面的激情表现, 但我们还是请到了其他优秀的嘉宾
H:但我们还是请到了其他优秀的嘉宾
H: She’s a very popular idol,Matsuyama Ai-chan大人气偶像 松山爱小姐
H: Ahhh!啊！
H: Her eyes look so lifeless!不知为何她一副死相
H: And she’s holding a cigarette in her hand!而且指间夹著看似香烟的物体
H: She isn’t her usual self!和平时的小爱完全不同！
A: ey, you, Mr.Host, shut up already. Don’t look down on me.我说那边那个主持, 叽叽喳喳吵死了！瞧不起我吗！
H: I’m not. But since this is a live show, a minor smoking is –岂敢岂敢，可这毕竟是现场直播，未成年人吸烟有点…
A: That’s fine. I’m actually 25, not teens as I told the public.没关系啦 我虽然对外说自己十几岁，其实已经二十五啦
H: Is that ture?! Ah ! Obayashi-san’s in shock! Don’t tell me you were a fan of hers!原来如此吗！啊 大林先生大受打击，难道是她的粉丝吗！
O: I like you anyway!即便如此我也喜欢你！
H I guess he was!:看来真是粉丝！
A: And I was going out with my manager when I debuted.啊 顺便一说，我是靠潜规则出道的
H: Ahhh! Once again, she’s coming out!啊啊 再次大胆放出爆炸性言论！
O:(喷)
H: Argh! Obayashi-san’s in shock!喷了！大林先生受到严重打击！
A: I pick my nose on my days off.休息日我都整天窝在家里挖鼻屎
H: This is tough too!这句也够狠！
O:(再喷)
H:Obayashi-san throws up!大林先生已经七孔喷血！
A:I haven’t changed my underwear for 3 days.我内裤已经三天没换了
H: Please stop!快住口啊！
H: What? Obayashi-san appears happy after hearing that comment.啊 大林先生对此反而十分高兴的样子
O: (幸福的笑)
H:By the way,Matsuyama Ai-chan will sing "So Tight! My Love "later on in the show.另外 松山爱小姐一会将位我们献唱一首, 「好紧！好紧！的恋情」，
A:Who’s going to sing that lame song? 谁要唱这种烂俗歌啊
A:Cut the crap, maggots!别开完笑了 你个臭虫！
O: Oh, please sing.别这么说嘛 唱吧唱吧
O: And can I have your underwear please?另外请把内裤给我
H: Obayashi-san’s mumbling something again!大林先生又说了些什么！
O: Hot! Argh!烫！!
H: Uaah! She gave a surprise cigarette burn to him,her fan and superior!哇啊 面对自己的粉丝兼大前辈的大林先生，居然以灼热的香烟伺候！
H:Look at his smile!然后大家请看这张笑脸！
H: This guy’s really something!这人着实了不得啊！
O: (享受的喘息)
A:If you want to hear it so bad , want me to sing now?这么想听的话现在就给你们唱好了
O: Yes, please拜托了
A: Burrp嗝～～
H: She burped! Yuck!一个大嗝 好恶心！
H:What song is that?!这算什么歌啊！
H:Was that okay with Obayashi-san?!以大林先生的角度能接受吗？
O:Em Ah Ah…哎 啊 啊
O: (大喷特喷)
H: No,it wasn’t!不能接受！
H: He thought about it for a second, but it was no good!
他想了一想 果然还是不能接受！
H:Em. The next guest is Nikaidou-san, the ventriloquist–Ah!呃 下一位嘉宾是 腹语艺人 二阶堂先生
H:Ah. The puppet is on the floor.啊 人偶掉地上了
N: That thing gives me creeps, so I threw it away.那个啊 忽然觉得很恶心于是就扔了
H: Threw it away?!扔了！？
H: Isn’t he your precious buddy?!它不是您重要的拍档吗！？
N: Are you kidding? This is my only buddy. 讨厌啦 我的拍档从来就只有 这个而已啦
H: What a jerk!好贱的人！
H:We have a spot for you to do a show later on…那个 接下来有请您表演腹语术
N: What? Please, give me a break?哎 饶了我吧
N:It’s very hard to perform ventriloquism.腹语术说起来很难的啦
H: That’s why it’s called an art.不 所以才叫才艺啊
N: The "pa" sound are the hardest.特别是pa音最难发
N: Whoever thought up those sounds ought to die.真希望发明pa音的那人去死
H: Die?!去死！？
N: ,Well then, I’ll do just a little.那我就露一小手吧
N: On second thought, should I?不过 来点啥好呢
N: I’m kind of…我想想
N: (打人偶)
H: Wh…What’s wrong, Nikaidou-san?怎…怎么了 二阶堂先生
N: (继续打人偶)Hey Hey!
H:He’s going at it!他好像还来劲儿了！
H: It’s getting interesting now that our guests are showing their true colors.嘉宾们的本性依次曝光，节目走向了有趣的方向
H: Let’s see what kind of color our next guest will be.接下来的嘉宾会为大家展现怎样的真面目呢
H: The world renowned magician, Magic Mitsui-san.世界级大魔术师 马饥渴•三井先生
M: I’m here to confess something today.我今天来这儿是有事想宣布
H: Yes! He’s got something to share too!啊 果然有料
M: Actually, the magic tricks I’ve been doing weren’t magic, but supernatural power.实际上 至今我所表演的魔术全都不是魔术而是超能力
H: What?!欸～！
M: X-ray vision for the card tricks,纸牌魔术用的是透视能力
M: as for the separation magic, I cut them for real and restored them using my supernatural powers.人体切断则是真切断了再用超能力粘回去
H: Scary!好恐怖 ！
N: (还在打) If you’re for real, show us something using that power. HeyHeyHey你要真是超能力者的话, 就耍点超能力给咱看看嘛
H:How long are you going to beat him, Nikaidou-san?你要揍到什么时候为止啊 二阶堂先生！
M: Well then, let me try with all my might to repel the meteoroid heading for the earth.那我来个猛的,，把正撞向地球的巨大陨石顶回去试试吧
H: Seriously?!哎 真的假的？
N: You can’t really do it, can you ?你不会真办的到吧？
A: You can’t mean it. You don’t need to be that serious.虽然觉得不可能 不过你不用太认真啊
O: That’s right. Earth is surely destined for destruction.对对 地球是注定要毁灭的啊
H: They’re getting anxious!三人坐立难安！
M: I’ll do it.那我开始了
M: (怪叫)
H: That yell was so uncool.发招声好衰！
M: I did it.啊 成了
H&O&A&N: No way!不会吧！？
N: I’m glad, Kevin-kun.太好了 凯文君
N: We’re saved.我们得救了
N: (腹语) We’ll do our best together, bro以后我们也要一起努力啊 哥哥
H: He’s doing it!开始说腹语了！
A: I was once chased by a pink kappa.伦家以前被粉红色的河童追过哟～～
H: She’s building her chara-image!开始塑造形象了！
O: I will work hard doing nothing but Enka ballads.我今后也会对演歌一心一意精进不懈！
H: I think anything you say will be too late!我觉得大林先生不管说什么都无法挽回了！
A: Why are you naked, Obayashi-san? Oh, no!呀 您怎么光着身 子的啦大林先生～～讨厌！
H:You didn’t care earlier!你刚才一直蛋定得很啊！
O: You’re misunderstanding something.不不 这是一场误会
H: What could be misunderstood there, Obayashi-san?!这是一场怎样的误会啊 大林先生！
H: Ah..We’ve learned that we need to keep our calm until the end.总之我们认识到了 最后绝不能自暴自弃的道理
H: Let’s go to a commercial break.接下来进入广告时间
H: I’m glad I didn’t show mine…还好我没走出去…
隱者の庭園 -The Garden of Recluse- 